Grief-sensitive marketing - a brand strategy must.

The dreaded firsts…

They say the “firsts,” events following a loved one's passing are always the hardest. Birthdays, Holidays, life experiences…

No matter how many times you hear it, it hits differently when you’re met with your own loss. For me this year was my first Mothers Day and Fathers Day without my Mom and Dad. I was dreading calendar dates for weeks and wanted to do my best to commemorate in my own way, feel the feels, and not be consumed by it.

But then in comes marketing…  

“Happy Mothers Day!”

“Last chance to treat Dad!”

“Treat your Mom with a mommy-daughter spa day”

“Get your Dad something extra special this holiday”

I knew it was everywhere, but never realized how inundating it could be. Promo after promo across social media, email, print, TV, every company had to have their own mark on the holiday. 

It’s an uphill struggle grieving while everyone else is celebrating, and it only hits deeper because the marketing around these events — is relentless. 

I’ll interrupt by saying - moms and dads are worth celebrating - always! I am in no way trying to cancel Mothers Day or Fathers Day. I’m acutely aware of my own sensitivities given my situation. I have an incredible mother-in-law and father-in-law who deserve being celebrated and I loved celebrating my parents on these dates during their lifetime. 

However, there is no denying these dates affect everyone differently. In fact, the governments support surrounding the topic was brought up in the UK Parliament.

I may be biased…

Working in marketing and brand management for nearly a decade, I’ve never been a fan of brands using holidays for profit. From Mothers/Fathers Day, to 911,  Memorial Day, Christmas, you name it - it always feels icky to me when brands pop their logo on a memorialized image or promote deals just to increase spending behaviors. And don’t even get me started on Valentine's Day, or “Hallmark Holidays…”

With that said, it’s also in our blood, one author states in their research about the history of these dates:

”we in the U.S. are more of a business than a country; after all, the U.S. was founded by entrepreneurs looking to strike it rich in the promise land. Is it not the American dream to establish an idea and make money off of it? The same money that promises us a better life if one possesses enough of it? We are corporate America – should we take that into account before ousting the notion of commercialization?”

In recent years, thanks to social media, awareness of this has begun to come to light with the popular “Flower Type” posts that circulate each Mothers or Fathers day, and while big calendar dates are important to retailers and customers, questions that arise for me are: 

Where do we cross the line between commemorating and exploiting?

How can I/we as brand marketers do better?

With brands today using our personal data to target us at moments we’re feeling most vulnerable (which is also a fascinating study of psychology and technology) there are ways marketers can better engineer messaging and deliverables to more authentically consider those who have a hard time with these calendar dates. 

An example Awra Mahdawi provides in her review of the advertising industry role on “Griefsploitation:”

“Facebook’s research explains that heartbreak is the ideal marketing opportunity for those in the travel business: in the month after a newly single Facebook user has announced their breakup, there is an “increase of 25% more travel-related purchases”. Apparently “travel therapy has replaced retail therapy”: 55% of people surveyed by Facebook said that traveling after their breakup helped them move on, while only 8% of people said that shoes helped them move on. Facebook is trying to help you heal. They care. They don’t want grief to consume you, they want you to consume your way out of grief.”

While “griefsploitation” may be ingrained in our system, by thinking differently about our own experiences and bias surrounding calendar events, the campaigns marketers produce and their effect on humans can have an even greater impact. 

One silver lining of COVID-19 is its push of the grieving process into the collective consciousness, which forced brands to adapt their messaging. There was no escaping bad, unthoughtful, messaging. The power is in the hands of the people and they let brands know what they did/do and did/do not approve of. 

This is why I stress the importance of a combination of strategy, psychology, and solutions. It has to be more than offering discounts and slapping a logo on the face of the perfect smiling family. We need to bring all voices to the table of varying backgrounds to create more thoughtful campaigns that align with the people they are to serve. 

Luckily, many brands are waking up to this and when done right, it can feel far less daunting, triggering and consuming. Rather thoughtful and engaging by making the experience more collaborative and giving people options on how they wish to be communicated with. 

A brand leading in a big way is Bloom and Wild’s “Thoughtful Marketing Movement.” They provide an easy opt-out process and encourage other brands to follow-suit. What is even more brilliant about this is that it helps the brand better understand their customers' individual needs and better segment and personalize contact lists or ads - which almost always leads to better communications, increased engagement, and of course – sales.

For those on their own grief journey, I’m sorry.  While there isn’t anything anyone can say to make it instantly go away, rest in knowing there are people, communities, and brands out there that see you and support you. 

For brand leaders and business owners, we’re all on a journey of learning and growing in our roles and the brands we represent. With so many things to consider within the strategic process, humanizing the experience for the people you serve is key. Better yet - the benefits of this mindset can be seen in the  relationships you have with your customers, your brand's impact within society, AND, of course, sales.

Questions for readers:

Has marketing impacted your grief journey?

If you work in marketing, how have you shifted your messaging?

What feedback or personal perspectives do you have on the topic?

Share your thoughts to be included in the evolution of this article - hello@angeliquemarya.com